In this 3rd week of Advent, we are being asked to love all. That’s a tall order given to us by Jesus that we struggle with on a daily basis. I wanted to offer some suggestions on how to better love the ones we tend not to.
1. Listen. Listening is about being present. You may not agree with what the person has to say, but allowing them to voice their opinion, frustrations, and concerns is a vital part of gaining trust and helping people feel loved and appreciated. Oftentimes, we listen to respond, or are coming into conversations and situations with our own agenda and don’t give the other person an opportunity to share what they need to share. So maybe this year, at your Christmas parties, you take an opportunity to chat with and listen to the people that you would otherwise avoid. Maybe their negativity is a result of not feeling heard or loved, maybe not, but it can’t hurt to try, right?
2. Time. Can you offer more of your time this Christmas season into the New Year? Could you visit a relative? Make yourself more present to your family? Put the cellphones away, turn the game off, and engage with each other. Time is fleeting. Share the moments you have with the ones you love in meaningful ways to help spread love and joy to those around you.
3. Learn about love languages. There are 5 love languages: physical touch, acts of service, words of affirmation, quality time, and giving/receiving gifts. We all have 2 primary love languages. Learn which ones you have and which ones your loved ones have. My husband’s primary love language is physical touch which is one that I struggle with. I have to work extra hard to hold his hand, give him hugs, or touch his back. One of my love languages is acts of service, which he struggles with. He has to work harder to do the dishes, or pick up a room, but when we do these things for each other, we feel recharged and loved. It’s difficult, but it is so worth it.
4. Openness. The hardest one and the issue I see the most right now is being open to other people’s ideas, perspectives, and opinions. We have to keep in mind that we all live this life with different challenges, lenses, opportunities, and experiences. We are all human. We have bad days, we make mistakes, we struggle with different situations, and we respond in different ways. Despite all these things, our end goal is the same: everlasting life with God in heaven.
Let us spread the Good News of Jesus in how we listen, care, love, and appreciate everyone this season and beyond. Christ is calling us to love everyone; every race, creed, tongue, and yes, political party. Can we be better humans, better Christians in this coming year, loving all and standing up for the teachings of Jesus? I believe we can.
